si dawson

experiments in self-improvement

Month: July, 2008

The "I Love You" Game

We really are our own worst enemy.

The little voice inside our head, criticising, judging, constantly questioning.

So what to do about it? Well, there are many ways – meditating, becoming more present, releasing, eft, you name it.

Here’s a fun way that I’ve discovered helps build self-acceptance, and lessen that voice.

I did this while walking about town, so it’s not the kind of thing that you need to be super-attentive to, or block out time to do.

Now, normally when this little voice starts up – our instinct is to suppress it. Ignore it. Now try doing the exact opposite. Call it up. See what it has to say.

So, if it comes up with “You’re lazy”? That’s great! Just sing back to it “I love you, lazy [whatever-your-name-is]” – and mean it!

I use a silly sing-song voice when I do it – it just keeps things light, stops me getting too serious about it all.

Then, just keep telling that part of you that you love it until it stops telling you this thing. Next, see what other little voices have nasty things to say. Once you open the floodgates, you’ll find there’s a ton there, but by giving them unconditional love, you dissolve them. You regain your power, and you see them for what they truly are, not these big fearful truths at all, but just your tiny ego, trying to get attention in any way it can.


pic by misssmile

It sounds crazy, but once you get into it, it’s actually a whole lot of fun, and the relief that comes is.. indescribable.

It really is true what they say “Love kills the demon”.

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    Hoop Dreams

    Know how surfing the net can sometimes lead you in unexpected directions? Recently I did this:

    Went from twitter to Sushi Zume to hoop lovers, hooping.org (the community), hoopinglife (the movie), and finally hoop revolution. After reading a lot & watching a few videos, like this:

    (shot in a Tokyo skyscraper, of all crazy places)

    I suddenly realised. Somehow, when my back was turned, old school “hula hooping” went from this:

    to just “hooping”, and this:

    (more here)

    I mean. Really. What the hell just happened? That’s…. HOT! (& insanely so.. although, of course, having a Van Der Graaf generator = extra points)

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      Are You Allowed To Be Happy?

      I realised something yesterday.

      I’m not allowed to be happy.

      Now, since I’m the one creating my life, what this actually translates to is I’m not allowing myself to be happy.

      What the… ? How did that happen?!?

      A lot of it is upbringing – we’re taught things, for better or worse. Don’t do this, make sure you do that…

      Some things we may rebel against (sex, drinking,..) and with that rebellion comes a certain illicit enjoyment.

      Others we may not, and so crossing those lines brings guilt, regret, anguish.

      On top of that, I know I’ve set up conditions for myself. I can’t be happy if… (I’m too lazy, too poor, single…)

      Well! It’s hardly surprising I wasn’t happy. If I’m waiting for my life to be perfect – and, while we’re on the subject, what IS perfection anyway? Meeting some entirely arbitrary list of criteria? Most of which I was barely conscious I was even creating? Well, that’s not going to happen in a hurry, now is it?

      So, first order of the day:

      Find these conditions and dump them!


      pic by LightSpectral

      Ok, so how to do that? Try finding a quiet spot, and letting your mind automatically fill the end of these sentences. Just start saying them with the expectation that something will fall out, and see what comes up. You may be very surprised (I know I was)!

      I can’t be happy because…
      I can’t be happy until..
      I’m not allowed to be happy because..
      It’s only right I should suffer because..
      I should be unhappy because..
      I’m sad because..
      I won’t be happy unless..

      You get the idea. Whatever comes up – clear it out – in whatever way works for you. Personally, I use releasing (sedona method), eft, and a bunch of other energy techniques.. but that’s just what I’ve found works best for me. You find what works for you – realising you have these ingrained belief systems is the first, but hardest step.

      And you know? It’s a strange thing, but even in the last day or so I’d say I feel 40-50% lighter. Clearer. Calmer, and yes, much, much happier.

      The important thing to realise is this: We are ultimately responsible for our own happiness. Not anyone else. Not our partners, our bosses, our family. You may have no control whatsoever over your immediate surroundings, but you are the only person who has the say in how you react to what happens around you. You decide how much you’re going to let things affect you or not.

      The great news is, even if your life seems utterly miserable, you can change yourself, and thus your happiness.. and I guarantee you, as your attitude changes, all those little things around you that have been bothering you for so long will almost magically change as well.

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        LSA, Linseed, Linseed Meal: Traps for Young Players

        I’ve recently been introduced to the benefits of LSA. That is:

        3 parts Linseed
        2 parts Sunflower seeds
        1 part Almonds

        This was used by Sandra Cabot as a liver cleansing diet (although originally put together by a couple of other Australians, in the 80’s).

        Ok, so that’s great. Soak, grind & add that to my diet, and we’re away. Right? Wrong.

        Turns out, I didn’t have any linseed hanging around the place, just some linseed meal – I figure that’s gotta be the same stuff, just ground up, so where’s the problem?

        One thing that juice fast taught me was to listen very, very closely to my body when I’m feeding it things, and I noticed that after having the LSA mix, something wasn’t quite right. Basically ok, just a little off.

        So I started doing some research.

        Linseed is another term for flaxseed. Flaxseed is well known as a source of omega-3’s, etc etc. So what’s the problem?

        Turns out linseed meal is a by-product of extracting the oil from flax/linseeds. Ie, it’s what’s left over after you take the oil away.

        Now, linseed meal is fed to horses, and is still high in protein, so what gives?

        Then I discovered this [pdf]. “The toxic action of linseed meal on trout”. Turns out some scientists discovered that when you feed linseed meal (ie, the by-product, not the entire seed) to trout, it turns them black. And blind. And dead.

        So. Entire seed, good. Meal, bad. Of Course! How Obvious! *facepalm*

        It’s a tricky world out there. Stay sharp kids!

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          Naked Bouldering – Can The Art Get Any Purer?

          Seriously, is there anything more beautiful than this?


          Pic (c) Dean Fidelman

          I’ve always loved bouldering for its simplicity. No ropes, no harnesses, no gear. Just you, your shoes, maybe a chalk bag.. and the rock. Never going high enough that a fall is likely to kill, but still adrenaline & lactic acid pumping hard enough that you can burn yourself out completely in half an hour (I know, I’ve done it on several occasions when there was only enough light for half an hour’s climbing *grin*).

          Turns out there’s a new craze, even purer, simpler, closer to nature. Climbing completely nude. California based climber & photographer Dean Fidelman (who took the photo above) has even released calendars of the climbing in action, called “Stone Nudes.”

          Climbing by itself is such an incredibly beautiful sport. Fluid, graceful motion, intense amounts of power, stunningly intricate technicalities & the pure harmonious blend of mind, body & spirit. To do it completely naked simply captures that beauty perfectly.

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