si dawson

Ever heard that say­ing "What you resist persists"?

Ahh yes.

I've noticed a few pat­terns in my life recently.

In gen­eral, I've spent the last few years on a bit of a spir­i­tual jour­ney. Clear­ing out, well, pretty much everything.

The down­side to this is, as I've got clearer, what remain­ing crap is there has echoed stronger & more pow­er­fully through my life. Ahh, I wish I'd been told that when I started. Actu­ally, prob­a­bly best I wasn't.

The bad news is, there are parts of my life that still suck. Like you wouldn't believe. Well, ok, I'm human. The good news is, they stand out like nobody's busi­ness. Also, it's much eas­ier to see when they're repeating.

So, here I am, look­ing at my life "Wtf? Didn't that same crappy sit­u­a­tion hap­pen 6mo ago? What's going on?"

Then, the other day, it hit me.

They've all been things I hate.

Now, of course, very early on, I went through all the core 'neg­a­tive' (if there is such a thing) emo­tions, assess­ing all the places in my life they affected, heal­ing them etc.

Of course, my life dras­ti­cally improved. Quelle surprise.

When I looked at hate, I came up blank though. "Huh? I don't hate any­one." My Mum brought me up way to well for that non­sense. I've gotta say, there have been a few peo­ple I prob­a­bly should (accord­ing to soci­ety) hate for the roles they've played in my life, but I still don't (thanks Mum).

What I realised lately though is — there's a lot of things I hate.

Guess what's recurring?

Sit­u­a­tions, behav­iours in those around me, lim­i­ta­tions, frus­tra­tions, ongo­ing problems.

Yep, no frickin' surprise.

Hate is resistance.

I'm resist­ing this non­sense, so of course, I'm just draw­ing it into me. How­ever you want to explain that (law of attrac­tion, retic­u­lar acti­vat­ing sys­tem, self sab­o­tage) is largely irrelevant.

The empir­i­cal evi­dence is this: Stuff I hate I just see more of in my life.

The big (& incred­i­bly obvi­ous) les­son? STOP IT.

Ok, so I like to keep things vaguely useful/practical around here. Bob has great advice above, but really, how do you stop hat­ing something?

I've shared lots of ways of doing this kind of thing before, so here's a real sim­ple way that's been help­ing me lately:

1. Give the issue a per­cent­age, 0–100% where 0=Hate It, 100%=I'm 100% ok with this thing hap­pen­ing.
2. Ask your­self, can I increase that per­cent­age? Say "Yes", out loud & as emphat­i­cally as possible.

Maybe it's just my ana­lyt­i­cal math brain, but that really res­onates for me. I typ­i­cally get a num­ber in my head instantly. Uhh, 20%, or 3%. What­ever. It doesn't mat­ter. It's just a start­ing point.

To work with this, there's a core real­i­sa­tion. You're the boss. You, the real You. Not your phys­i­cal body, not your mind, not even your ego. The large, spir­i­tual you. The essence of you. Your consciousness.

For exam­ple, if you decide to stop think­ing about some­thing, who makes that deci­sion? You do. Not your brain. Your brain is just the tool. That's the real you mak­ing that deci­sion. The core of your being.

Soooo. Once you realise that you're the boss, then every­thing is really just a deci­sion. Includ­ing the deci­sion to actu­ally be ok with some­thing you used to hate.

How/Why Does It Work?
1. Say­ing 'yes' puts you in a pos­i­tive mind­frame rather than neg­a­tive (ie, resis­tant, hat­ing). Sales­men have known this for eons, of course. Noth­ing new there.

2. Say­ing 'yes' releases resis­tance to the issue. Even just accept­ing it a lit­tle can help shift things, open you up & let go of that hate (or secret shame, as is often the case with deep hatred) and thus resis­tance. Once the flood­gates open, voila, you're on your way.

I know, sounds crazy, but give it a bit of a go, be patient & watch what happens.

Of course, if you feel like using EFT, releas­ing, reiki, NPA or any­thing else at the same time, so much the bet­ter. What­ever helps.

When you do finally get up to 100% you'll realise. You just don't hate it any more, in fact, you couldn't care less. Know what? You'll stop see­ing it in your life too.

For me, I got a piece of paper, on the left wrote "Things I f'n Hate", on the right "% Ok with it" then just made a list. Going down, even just say­ing "YES, I hate …" it's the cra­zi­est thing, but I could feel the hate lift­ing off & that per­cent­age rising.

Another inter­est­ing side effect? All this say­ing yes. I've had inner ten­sion (that my sen­sei can feel, but is hard for me to pin­point) for, well, prob­a­bly my entire life. With this? I can actu­ally feel it eas­ing. Don't know how, or even what it is, but it's def­i­nitely lifting.

Who­ever thought being pos­i­tive would be ben­e­fi­cial? *grin*