I Love Myself For Hating This

Sometimes life just sucks.

Well, actually it never sucks, but that’s a whole other story.

Sometimes it feels like life just sucks.

Everything seems to be going wrong. We’re in a terrible mood. We ate some bad clams & the neighbour just ran over our poodle.

In these situations, despite everything we know (in our brains), it can be super hard to even motivate ourselves to do the simple things that will help. Meditate, EFT, go for a run, you name it.

So, here’s a simple trick I learned. Enough to kick you out of a slump & get you calm enough to bring your other tools into play.

Just say “I love myself for hating this.”

That’s it. You don’t even have to believe it, just say it. Keep saying it. You’ll feel yourself calm down super quick.

Like so many of these things, the more energy you put into it the better it will work, of course.

If you’ve got the space, hell, scream it.

zim_scream.jpg

Why not? & besides, a good scream now & then can be cathartic. Just don’t scare the cat.

Why does it work? Well, firstly it takes your focus (ie your energy) away from “it” – the thing you’re hating, angry about, upset by or whatever, & brings it onto yourself.

Secondly, you’re giving yourself love, approval, acceptance. Even just saying the words “I love myself” with zero energy behind it is helpful, if you’re in a really negative space. If you can say it & mean it, well, so much the better.

What’s this all about? Well, self-love, self-approval, self-acceptance are the corner stone of any deep healing.

& what better time to heal than when you’re pissed off about something? Maximum emotional connectivity, so maximum effectiveness.

Oh, & feel free to change the words around to suit your situation. “I love myself for being upset”, “I love myself for throwing up”, “I love myself for dancing badly.” It’s your life, you make the rules.

One thing I’ve been learning in spades recently is that life can always be easier, if we just get the hell out of the way & let it be.

Oh, & here’s another awesome technique I found that helps too. Super simple, takes about 2 seconds. It’s all great stuff!

  • someone
    hey si, new reader here. how come u don't post anymore? i'm looking forward to it. great post :) helps me heal.
  • Oh, I'm still here. Had some Biiiiig life changes (moved house, moved in with partner & her two kids), so yeah, been adjusting to those. Haven't stopped writing, just mulling life in general. :)
  • someone
    good to know that u're still there :) u might not know me, but i have the best times reading ur blog. helps me understand and straighten quite a few things in my life :) i *really* love this post of yours. i love myself for hating this. its so empowering and self-acceptance really is the beginning of significant healing.

    thanks, si. i want to let you know that you have contributed in my life although you don't know who i am :)
  • Wow. Well thank you so much for saying so. I'm truly touched.
  • kathleen
    I read this a couple of days ago..and I've been using your advice in all sorts of ways on all sorts of things. And I must say it really helps!
    It's easy to love ourselves when life is good, when we're doing well, when we feel buoyant...but the challenge is to love ourselves when we're down, when we've made a mistake, when we fail :( ...and of course these are the very times when we need MORE love, not less.
    Your article reminds us that true love is unconditional - and that we're lovable in spite of our faults, and sometimes because of them :-)
    So thanks! !
  • You're so VERY right *smile*
  • I love myself for throwing up? Has a nice ring to it... like it could be on a bumper sticker.

    ;)

    But seriously, I agree with you. I particularly like the maximum emotional connectivity argument. I may be due for some cathartic screaming.
  • One of those paradoxes of life - the time when you LEAST feel like sorting something out (healing it) is THE best time to be doing so.
  • I love myself for now having "I Hate Myself for Loving You" stuck in my head.

    I will try this next time I get upset.
  • How about now? Are you upset I waited two days to reply? Just trying to help you find a good moment to test things out :)
blog comments powered by Disqus