What To Do When Life Kicks You In The Balls
Sometimes, life can really harsh your mellow.
As a friend of mine recently described “It feels like I’m getting a hole kicked in my chest every 6 hours.”
Wow. Yes.
If you have no idea what I mean by this, well, I’m damn happy for you. It sucks. No-one should have to experience this kind of pain. Unfortunately though, many of us do.
Now, depending on how hard these situations hit us, our motivation can go from normal to death level. So, it’s less about what we SHOULD do, and more about what we CAN do. If you can’t even lift your head off the floor (yes, I’ve been there), then recommending that we go do some exercise isn’t going to help.
We may need to work our way up to standing before we go for that five mile jog.
To that end, here’s a list of suggested approaches. If you’re feeling only slightly crap, then you could start with the first one – it’ll give you the biggest bang for your buck.
If you’re not up to that, it’s ok, just work down the list until you find something you can do. It’ll help. It all helps. When you’re feeling better, you can work your way back up the list to number 1.
Oh, and if you’re feeling up to doing any given item, then you should be able to easily do everything below it on the list too. Again, it all helps.
The only thing that matters is getting you feeling good again, as soon as possible.
Emotional or psychic pain usually has a physical component – often in our stomach or chests. They’re just feelings. They’re coming up because they want to leave.
Imagine a big balloon way above your house. Send all the pain there – not angrily, not defensively; authoritatively. Give it a name “the hole kicked in my chest”; “this shit I’m dealing with”; (or whatever best describes it, succinctly). Tap your karate chop point and say its name to help connect with the feeling. Welcome it all up & send it out until it’s done & gone.
Then blow up the balloon.
Here’s the thing – it all ties together. You get rid of the physical, the emotional goes with it too. Our systems (physical, emotional, mental, energetic) are incredibly sympathetic.
2. EFT
Don’t worry about saying anything. When things are this rough, you don’t need to. Just do three full rounds. Drink some water. That’ll help damp it all down and get the energy moving out, take the edge off. That’s the absolute worst case. More likely, it’ll get you feeling better, calmer – and damn quickly.
3. Tap your karate chop point
If EFT feels like too much work (or, say, you can’t even lift your head off the pillow), then just tap your karate chop point.
(Rod’s at Tap4Health. I’ve worked with him, he kicks ass)
Do that for a few minutes. Seems like bullshit, but it will help. It all helps.
4. Take care of your body
Drink some water. Have a multivitamin, and, ideally, a 5HTP if you have any around (it’ll get your seretonin back to normal levels). You know, just help your physical body. I suppose if you were feeling enthusiastic you could also go do some exercise. Go to the gym. Go punch something. Anything to get a sweat up. That’ll help too.
What’s the deal with exercise? Well, apart from the endorphins etc that are kicked up, using your muscles is the only way for your lymphatic system to flush itself clean. Why is this important? Coz your lymph system is basically the toxin garbage system for your body, but, unlike your vascular system (your blood) the lymph system doesn’t have a pump (like the heart). You have to use your muscles to clear it out.
The upshot of this? A lot of times, particularly when under stress, our body gets loaded up with toxins, which makes us feel even crappier – but it’s just biochemistry. Exercise, help the lymph system clear itself out, the toxins etc go, and voila, we feel better. Simple, really.
You can feel when your lymph nodes are blocked up by pushing/rubbing them – under the armpits, inside thigh, or just below the clavicle. If they hurt, they need clearing. The sharper among you will have noticed – these points coincide perfectly with some of the EFT tapping points. No, this is not an accident.
And the water thing? (yes, I rave about it). Very simple. We’re 70+% water. All your internal organs need water to operate properly. They can’t flush junk out of your system if they’re dehdryated. If your organs aren’t working optimally? Yes, you’ll feel crappier.
5. Get someone who loves you to hug you for a minute
A full minute. Just let them hold you, and know that while they are, the entire rest of the world can go away. You’re safe.
We’re all monkeys (and people say we monkey around). We all need physical contact.
6. It will be ok
If all the above just seems like too much work and you can’t even do #5, then just hear this:
I know it doesn’t feel like it right now. I know it feels like a world of never ending shit, but it will get better. Life can’t, won’t continue being this shitty for the rest of forever. Yep, crappy as all hell right now. Hurts. Sucks. Is rough as hell… but life changes, everything changes. Always. If nothing else, just know that in a coupla weeks, a ton of this stuff won’t feel quite as bad. It’ll be a memory.
In ten years you’ll probably struggle to remember it at all (or you simply won’t care). There might be some ongoing stuff, but a big chunk of it will be a distant memory. You will feel better again. You’ll have up days. All you gotta do is keep eating. Keep breathing. Keep drinking water. Keep getting hugs anywhere you can. I know that doesn’t help you right now, but it’s something to hang on to. Something to look forward to.
No matter how shit things are right now, life will always change. This will pass.
Also? I love you.