I’ve been using EFT daily for a long time. The commonest confusion I’ve heard in that time is “What do I say?”
Generally speaking, what you say is more or less irrelevant. It serves primarily to keep you focused on the situation or issue you’re tapping out.
Understandably then, I was pretty excited to discover the other day a neat side step around the whole damn pickle.
Here’s what he recommends:
- Tap the karate chop point (side of hand) while describing the issue (just say a short descriptive phrase three times).
- Then tap on each point (5-10 times) and say “Let it go.”
And by “short descriptive phrase”, the easiest way to think of one is this: Imagine what you’re tapping on is a movie. What’s the title of that movie? Right, that is your phrase.
Interestingly, this is a sort-of intersection between releasing and tapping. Releasing, in essence, is about welcoming up all feelings & letting them go. In other words, say “yes” to them, instead of (our more usual, avoidant, escapist) “no.”
Whatever. It works, really well.
I have found if I write the short phrase down in front of me I can keep my eyes on that, which helps keep my brain from dancing off elsewhere (down monkey, sit down!).
Also useful is to vary the phrase a little, depending on how you feel, and what feels best at the time:
- Letting it go
- I choose to let it go
- It’s safe to let it go
- I choose to let it go completely
- Letting it all go
[edit: update a month later. These are SUPER powerful]
- I love you (or this)
- I choose to love you (this, it, etc)
(you get the idea. Just remember, you’re the boss. Reassert that and (lovingly) allow this stuff to get the hell out)
This, combined with mind-mapping has enabled me to have quite possibly the most productive healing weekend of my life. I feel like I’m floating on a sea of endless, effortless love. I don’t know how long it’ll last (maybe 5 mins, maybe till tomorrow, maybe forever? It doesn’t matter), but while it’s here, I’m loving it (and everything else that pops in my my mind).
Extra for experts
A good way to ensure you’ve cleared things completely is to first of all measure (0-10) how much emotional resonance there is with the issue (“How much does it hurt?”). Then tap, then measure again. Rinse, wash, repeat until you’re at zero. It’s also good to take a few deep breaths and let it all out afterwards.